so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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