So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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