well you can't waste a boner
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
