I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
