we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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