I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
