I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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