Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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