so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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