Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
