How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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