i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
