I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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