okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
