Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
