handjob tips. give me some.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
