then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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