Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
