She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
