So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
