His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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