I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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