Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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