So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Randomize
