i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
only if we run a train.
done.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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