Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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