Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
