I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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