So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Every concussion has its silver lining
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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