They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
