so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Dignity is for republicans.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
