This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
