I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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