Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize