he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
