You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
