I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize
