i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
