I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
