This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
