So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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