I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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