Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
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