no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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