Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
