You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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