I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
We need to get me chipped asap
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
