my phone needs a breathalizer
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
