I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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