You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
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